Tonight I watched a documentary about an American white family adopting an 8 year old little Chinese girl. It was touching and I think I cried about every 10 minutes. In the end, the girl had a lot of questions about why they wanted a "Chinese" girl and the family was speaking with a therapist about it, some of the issues really baffled them.
I realized in some ways I understand. My kids (some more than others) look pretty different than me. I have often wondered about how I will teach them and prepare them for the the world and know all the answers, like good Mommies do.
So I will tell you the truth, I know very much that I only know what it's like to be white. Even if I observe alot, I only know what it's like to live in my fair skin. I know that.
I know that I can't teach you everything you need to know. I hope and pray for some person in your life to give you good advice and be a role model in ways I can't be, and I will truly be grateful. Someone to tell you the good things about brown from a place of knowing in a way I can't.
Here is the only thing Mommy does know Mijos: Mommy has walked down alot of roads before you and can give you good advice (and one day you'll know it's good advice)-but I can't walk down all the same roads as you, even if our skin matched. It's the same way with every kid. It's o.k. with me and I want it to be o.k. with you. Ultimately you are God's child before mine and he has prepared a way and, all this skin color is his design. So it's o.k. If someone doesn't care to get to know you are decides something about you before you open your mouth, you will find a way to cope. He will send you an answer better than mine, one that is knowing unlike mine.
This is what I do know.
3 comments:
Beautifully said. I love how very young children don't see color, they just see another kid. I believe that it is the ideas of adults that change their way of thinking as they get older. If all parents taught their kids to celebrate diversity instead of question it we would never have to answer those tough questions.
Your kids are lucky to have you as a mom. You will teach them about diversity, tolerance and acceptance no matter what color their skin is... and that is a blessing.
Your kids are so beautiful its hard to think that people could be so mean. You write so eloquently and beautifully. I miss you and wish we lived closer. I would love to see Adrianna and Electa playing together. They look so much alike to me. Miss you sister!
;) your kiddos are beautiful just like their mom in so many ways...we sure do miss you guys
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